


Never Leave Home Without It

by Kris



Category: Chuck (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-03-27
Updated: 2009-03-27
Packaged: 2017-10-12 09:59:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 585
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/123646
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kris/pseuds/Kris
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Let me ask you something, hypothetically speaking, if I were to say, rescue my two handlers from a few armed and dangerous men and one very violent monkey in the middle of a terrorist plot to dump poison into the water main and kill everyone."</p><p>"A violent monkey?"</p><p>"Hypothetically speaking of course," Chuck reiterates</p>
            </blockquote>





	Never Leave Home Without It

"Answer the phone," Chuck says urgently, the cell just keeps ringing the landline on the other end of his call. He peaks his head out from around the corner of the really big boxes he's hiding behind, winces and shakes the phone in his hand like that's going to do any good at all. Except it does, it totally does, Chuck is like the guru of willing people to answer their calls by shaking his phone, or something.

"Hello?" Bryce asks, a bit conversational, a bit interested, a bit worried.

"Oh thank god," Chuck sighs. "Bryce."

"Carmichael!" Bryce says and Chuck's brain seizes for a second and he winces again.

"Are you on a mission?" he asks tentatively. He can hear party sounds in the background.

"I would be yes," Bryce is smiling, Chuck can tell it's not the nice smiling. He shakes his head to derail thoughts about Bryce and his good smiling.

"Sorry, I just, I have a really important question. About spying!" there's a really obvious pause at the other end and Chuck sighs. "Sorry." He says again.

"Look, could I call you back? I'm kind of in the middle of something," Chuck peers over the boxes again. He ducks and yelps when a spray of bullets comes overhead.

"Me too," he says.

"Chuck, was that sound what I think it was?" Bryce asks. He still sounds pleasant but Chuck lived with him for like, a year, Chuck can tell when Bryce is wearing his Imma Eat Your Face Smile.

"If you thought it was a spray from an NP-90 then yes, yes it was. Let me ask you something, hypothetically speaking, if I were to say, rescue my two handlers from a few armed and dangerous men and one very violent monkey in the middle of a terrorist plot to dump poison into the water main and kill everyone."

"A violent monkey?"

"Hypothetically speaking of course," Chuck reiterates. "And say, hypothetically speaking, that I'm stuck behind a large cluster of boxes that aren't going to hold up well under fire from a couple of FN P90's and my two handlers were zip tied up in the middle of the room back to back and the poison is about two seconds from being mixed into the water reservoir?" Chuck says.

"Are you asking me what you should do?" Bryce asks. Chuck pulls the phone away to glare at it for a second.

"Yes," he says evenly. "I'm asking you what I would hypothetically do in this situation."

Bryce hmms for a second and Chuck can hear a door closing and then the party sounds from before are muted. "Do you have your multi-tool?" and Chuck pulls it out of his pocket.

"Yes, what kind of self respecting nerd would I be if I didn't have a multi-tool on me at all times?"

"You stole it because it was the only thing pointy you could find in the car wasn't it?" Bryce asks.

"Yes," he admits grudgingly. He listens to Bryce intently and then acts. He hadn't known Sarah could do that with a multi-tool. He winces. He hadn't wanted to know a monkey could do that. He's never going to look at them the same way ever again.

"Ewwww," he says.

"Chuck?" Bryce asks.

"It's..." he tries, and then "the monkey..." before he settles on "ewwwww" again.

"Right, so, we're okay?" Chuck nods. "Chuck, I can't hear you nodding on the phone," Bryce says.

"Yes, right, were fine. Hypothetically. Okay, thank you."


End file.
